There are four components to the narcissist’s grandiosity, they are:
1. Omnipotence (having unlimited power).
2. Omnivore (perfectionism and completeness)
3. Omniscience (having infinite knowledge).
4. Omnipresence (being everywhere simultaneously).
Omnipotence (having unlimited power): The narcissists grandiose fantasies serve to preserve his belief in his “God-like” omnipotence. Preserving this belief, he feels powerful in the knowledge that he can excel at anything he chooses to do; he will be a winner by applying his “Divine” mind to the task, whatever it is. Without this grandiosity he would have to face the reality of his own shortcomings (abilities, education, overwhelming fears), which he denies to himself fervently.
Omniscience (having infinite knowledge): The narcissist likes to present himself as “all knowing”. In his head he is the authority, the sage, the guru. He sets up his own cult following, with all his little devotees hanging on to his every word, and he is the Master. Obviously, he does not know everything, so when he is in any danger of being exposed, he lies and stretches the truth beyond recognition. Rather than admit that his knowledge escapes him, he will resort to lies in order to protect his false superiority, and will quote untruths to make himself look the expert. He is constantly transforming himself, like the magician, using sleight of hand in order to manipulate objects around him. With age he may even metamorphose into a “Divine Being”, Avatar within his own territory.
Having not achieved academic achievements through conventional education, narcissists may become autodidacts at some point in their life. This self-teaching and self-directed learning is safer than leaving them open to scrutiny with their peers, and saving them from having to face examinations, and the fear of failing. Some will, according to their plan for learning, avail themselves of instruction from family members, friends, or other associates. The narcissist keeps re-inventing himself, adding new fields of knowledge as he goes because, at heart, he fancies himself as a “Renaissance Man” (who is skilled in multiple fields or multiple disciplines, and who has a broad base of knowledge).
Omnipresence (being everywhere simultaneously): The narcissist sets up his environment in such a way that he is at the center of his Kingdom. Everything that happens there revolves around him, and he controls everything within it. According to him, without his presence, the Kingdom and everyone in it would soon disintegrate, and disappear forever. Everyone and everything depends on his being there as Captain, he is the brains that “keep the boat afloat”, in-fact, according to him, without him there would be no boat. His grandiosity makes him a powerful dictator of his little Kingdom, and all the power is his alone. Anything that happens there start and end with him, his word is law. Even outside of his Kingdom, when he attends meetings, he assumes the role of sage, and he expects to carry a special position in any decision making. If this does not happen, then he will no longer attend such meetings.
Omnivore (perfectionism and completeness): The narcissist is an omnivore. One striking behavioural characteristic of all omnivores is their opportunism. Omnivores must be prepared to switch rapidly from one supply resource that may be running out at the end of its ‘season’ to another as it becomes available. The narcissist gobbles up everything, devouring and digests all in his wake. What you have, he wants, whether it is achievements, knowledge, skills, ideas, experiences, work, things etc., and he will manipulate in any way he has to in order to get whatever it is that he wants. He is incapable of enjoying anything, because his one constant is the pursuit of perfection and completeness. The narcissist’s goal is to be the biggest and the best in absolutely everything he is interested in; the biggest house, the fastest car, the most money, the greatest power, be the most beautiful, and of course own the most successful business. They cannot delay gratification either, they live only in the “now”. Their greed and envy is such that they do not tolerate the word “no” in any make or shape. They have a “famine” mentality, and they do not suffer from survivor guilt. The narcissist cannot tolerate anybody having anything better than him, because it taps into his feelings of inferiority of not being good enough, not perfect enough, not smart enough, and this sends him into a rage. His outrageous grandiosity helps to shields him from the pain that he is not perfect. His over exaggerated stories makes him feel that he is “special”, and this boosts his ego, helping him to feel better and more important. His grandiosity also gets him attention, and this attention feeds his obsessional need for the adoration of his False Self, a False Self that is omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent, and omnivore. In order to survive the illusion, his True Self is abandoned to the outer regions of the cosmos.
Her books, “The Three Faces of Evil: Unmasking the Full Spectrum of Narcissistic Abuse” and “When Shame Begets Shame: How Narcissists hurt and shame their victims” set out to to help those who have been affected by a narcissist and also to address the shortfalls in a therapist’s education, so that they become better equipped to work with survivors of narcissistic abuse.Much of her knowledge has come from her post-grad studies in Criminology and Forensic Psychology, and it is through these disciplines that she has gained her understanding of “The Dark Triad”, (Narcissism, Machiavellianism and Psychopathy).
These three faces of evil are vital information for understanding the full spectrum of narcissistic abuse and the dire effects on the victims.It is her vision that narcissistic abuse becomes part of the curriculum of all Mental Health clinicians.
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